being able to dance around unimpeded by being afraid of stomping too loudly
I might not have a balcony or a patio and I might have ants to high hell
but I can dance around like the drunk ho I am without fear of my neighbors <3
I am a sham of a human
in good news: I apparently don’t need gabapentin to be a sham of a human! I have been of it for more than a week and a half now and all I’m dealing with is a slightly elevated non-existence. it was horrible at first - nausea, extreme pain, and exhaustion - but I guess that’s to be expected after being on a drug for 10+ years?
in other news I’ve somehow survived 10 years past my 16th birthday
i’m not sure how that happened
Oh man, you turn into my mom. She’s beautiful and mostly-graceful and funny and lovely in person, but the moment you turn the camera on her she gets all yellow and splotchy and awkward. My dad used to have red hair, but I don’t think he ever was very freckled…those come from my mom’s extremely Irish family…
99. according to amazon, they are “Parchment” colored. much too light for my tastes. I do not like seeing dirty bedspreads. I want to pretend they’re clean when they’re not >_>
87. I am not 13, tyvm :P
Mental illness is not like make up. You cannot apply it in the morning then remove at home where there is no one around. It will not make people love you more. You cannot put on a coat of depression, dust on anxiety, draw on your self injuries and spray your bulimia. It is not something so people think you are beautiful, Mental illness is not beautiful.
Mental illness is a disease to the brain. It makes you sick, the voices that you hear are no one else’s but your own. You get tired of things that you once loved, you get tired of people you once loved. Sometimes, you get so scared to go outside that you’d rather die inside your room. You hate yourself and hate yourself, you have no other way to express it but to draw blood. You remember that there are 49 calories in an apple but forget how to smile.
It is not like make up. You are not playing ‘Mommy’ or ‘Grown Ups’ It will not make you any more or less beautiful. So please stop pretending and romanticising mental illness.
This is true, especially about anorexia and bulimia. Even in 2014, they’re disgustingly romanticized and even desired by far too many people.
But, at the same time, it should also be imperative to stop assuming that everyone who doesn’t express mental illness in the same way as you or those you know is “faking it”, “pretending”, or not really mentally ill.
Cant we all just be decent to each other? Don’t assume the worst of people. Don’t assume that people are lying about things that don’t make sense to lie about. Even if they are, it may well be because of an entirely different mental illness.
Look, just don’t be a dick, alright? I’ve been clinically depressed since 9, on tons of drugs since my teens, never been “normal”, and have STILL been accused of “pretending” to be mentally ill, just because my drugs make me numb and unfeeling most of the time.
Mental illness sucks. It’s not something to be faked, and it’s not something to assume YOU have but others don’t.
I just want to show them I think they’re worthy, you know? And I’ve given much more significant amounts when I’ve had “extra” money, even though I’m sure I could have put that towards my own student loans or savings account.
But for some damn reason, I feel weird getting money. I don’t feel like I’ve earned it.... Read more